You may have noticed, I was in a "down" mood lately. I was obsessing about the idea that maybe
"that's it", that "this is as good as it gets" and that things wont get any better. The idea is so scary people. It freaks me out! Imagine that.......
"that's it", that "this is as good as it gets" and that things wont get any better. The idea is so scary people. It freaks me out! Imagine that.......
Well, I won't get into that now. It doesn't matter, actually it does, but that's not what I wanted to share with you today.
Because of this dark cloud above my head, I have been feeling sort of sad ; like I haven't achieved anything or done much in my life. And somehow, when you're down, even the positive things in your life seem dull, like the stars in the sky stop appearing due to dark clouds but once unexpected winds come over shoving the dark clouds away, you'd feel amazed by the amount of bright twinkling little dots glittering your name in the sky.
In my case, two concurrent winds came over; one of my flatmates from London came to visit and then I met this random stranger. I met the stranger first, preparing for this meeting was so awkward. I thought that I may have to playback the last couple of years to see what funny stories i can say or insightful and meaningful lessons i learnt. Something funny yet sophisticated. And the sad thing was, that when I tried to do that, I went blank; all i could remember were the sad things. But then we met , and whether or not he shared my enthusiasm , I felt happy because those memories of the cool and crazy things came with not recalling effort.
With my flatmate , it was funny, we haven't met (except for 10 mins on my Hajj trip ) since London , and that's 6 years ago, but yet, somehow, it was like we met last week and need to catch up. A lot has changed for both of us. And just talking about it.. comparing now to 6 years ago, talking about the good and bad, I sort of realized. It wasn't *that* bad after all.
Thing is.. this weekend, I realized. I have a love for life.. actually, a lust for life. I love so many things and like to try out some more. I like indoors and outdoors, the active life as well as the little luxuries. I like travel and cultures and parties and sports. Yet I enjoy domestic activities like cooking, reading and crafts. I'm a geek deep inside yet I care for fashion and social life. I love romantic movies and cheesy romance novels as well as science fiction , super heroes and fantasy stuff. I like everything, almost! No wonder I'd have more disappointments than most people, I have more of everything than most people.
So faithful blog followers... I, Yasmine El-Mehairy, the most bipolar person you could ever meet, have made the realization that , from now on, I will make life, a beautiful thing. That's how I see it when I am in my "ups", May God bless me with the ability to still see it this way when i'm in my "downs".
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