A piece of my mind

The increasing number of subjects that I don't want to talk about lately is becoming alarming. I'm assuming this means that I'm not happy where my life is going or at least where my life "is" right now. I'm becoming tense and irritable. A handful! Even my best friends are tired of my constant complaints (at least I'm smart enough to know that without them having to mention it). But really.. it's one of those phases which I just feel like curling into a ball, hide in the corner and hope nobody finds me. I just can't answer those questions anymore: Why is he calling you? I don't want to talk about it. What are you planning to do about your career?Did you apply for jobs? How are your interviews going? I don't want to talk about it. Where is folana? We havent heard her name in a while. What are you doing this weekend? Why don't you go out anymore? I don't want to talk about it.Are you still on a diet? loosing weight? Is that your lunch?

I couldn't sleep the night before night.. or rather had something between nightmares and interrupt rest filled with stomach cramps. By 8 a.m , I was so in pain, I decided I might as well get up, eat something in order to be able to take some pain killers, which I did! But nothing worked.. And hey, there's the feeling quit down regarding the job market in Egypt? It's like nothing is interesting out there..yes there are jobs, but nothing like what I have in mind... Then there is the emotional emptiness and lonliness mixed with confusion and doubt... And then I'm sick and tired of diet-food... And there's the , "Oh shit, my saving are running out after paying for this PMP course that I'm taking" and there's the pain in knowing I still have to pay another $500 to actually take the exam. All that to improve my chances of getting a job in the job market I was just cursing earlier. And ofcourse, the "Oh shit, I'm running out of money" And di

It all started when I realized that I heard more stories in the last year about people who took off to "find their true selves", "search for the truth" or "look for the meaning of life" than I have ever heard in my life. I guess in the past, I've always heard about it in movies ; the middle-aged American millionaire who achieved everything in life and feels empty sells his entire company and use the money to buy a yacht to tour the world. Or the Japanese wiz-kid who retires at the age of 30 with his billions and decides to use the rest of his life as a chance to make up to the world for the harmful inventions he created. Maybe the European royalty who got so sick and tired of fame, fortune, fast expensive cars and fabulous female companions and went on exploring the meaning of life by sleeping on the street in rags. But to hear that people doing this search/exploration/adventure..etc are people I know (or at least can relate to at some level), either s

There is this emptiness. And apparently , I'm not the only one feeling it; others feel it too, or at least have felt it. I've talked to some, heard the story of others, read (and reading ) books. It may just be a phase , but its challenging me mentally. I gave quite an introduction but still haven't mentioned what the hell I mean. That's really it.. I don't "exactly" know what I mean.. I know it has to do with: identity - partners/families or the lack of - travel/immigration - life's purpose..etc. I think , i'll be blogging about some of these thoughts and questions within the next few days, and comments are highly appreciated since it is a thought process not a finalized thought or idea

Diet (3 and 4) After the hell caused by Diet 2, I wanted something slightly more "edible" when I visited my Dr. I said I could go on a diet for 9 days , even if its hard, because I knew I was not gonna follow any instructions while in Alex for 4 days. So I was given two diets, the cantaloupe diet and the "Cesar salad" which by the way, has nothing to do with the actual Cesar salad except that it is salad based. I sticked to the diet most of the time, even while being in a bazaar and seeing the amazing Dina Cantina cupcakes glittering and begging to be eaten. I only messed by half an evening when I was starving for a whole day and was only offered some mini-pizzas. Disappointment and Payback I was very disappointed when I found out, that after 9 days of salad and fruit, I only lost half a kilo (remember the song from last time!) The Dr. said I may be going through normal hormonal changes or that my body has gotten used to the dieting and refuses to loose weight. I do

Or in other words ; zeww goes on a diet. (1) Prelude Once upon a time, long long ago, zeww used to be thin and beautiful. Well, she did always have some *minor* weight issues, but those were mostly controlled. Then about 6 months ago, an evil witch got so jealous and casted a spell on her. Ever since, zeww has been gaining weight and her usual weight control methods stopped working. So, under so much pressure, mostly from her mum, zeww considered to go visit a diet-ition. (2) Preparation As you know, in any story, once the protagonist *me*, start considering an end goal, they usually find some companion to accompany them on their journey. So, in my case, Meyo decided, she may as well join the journey and loose a couple of kilos. The next event is usually a conflict of interest, one wants to go east, the other wants to go west. In this case, Meyo wanted to look for someone in Mohandeseen and I wanted Heliopolise, but we sorted that out. Then naturally, once one attempts a journey, all

وسيم , جذاب , ذو شخصية آخاذة ,مبهر في كل شئ عيناه تكلمها بلغة ,لا يفهمها إلا هي و ضحكته كفيلة أن تجعل من أي حزن , فرح و سعادة شغفته حباً و عشقاً ًو لكنه يسافر كثيرا ًو يغيب طويلا و تنقطع أخباره و ذات يوم , تقابلا , و التقت أعينهما و ظنت ؛ ربما , و لما لا؟ و عادات العادات و المكالمات و ملأ قلبها الأمل ثم سافر و انقطعت الأخبار فإنتظرت و تمنت ثم أنتظرت و بكت ثم أنتظرت و ما اصعب الانتظار, فهو يزيد الحيران حيرة ثم لم يعد هناك انتظار و عبست ناظرة إلى السماء كأنها تعاقب القدر الذي طالما يخفقها و قالت بمزيج من الحزن و الألم , لا, لن أكون محطة مصر

اتدري انك حين تلمس يدي يرفرف قلبي بين ضلوعى كصغير الطير ما لبث ان تعلم الطيران , سعيدا بتحليقه في الافاق بعيدا عن الكل , خائفا يرتقب السقوط : الا أن قلبي سقط من بين ضلوعي الي راحة يدك

I haven't had a chance to "read" in a while, but then, in my last Alex trip, I gave some time to reading out what I missed. I also had the chance to watch a few movies which I wanted to see. I thought I might as well share some short reviews. Books: Brida - Pau lo Co elho A typical Paulo Coelho by all means. It's an easy read, you find yourself turning pages and feeling fulfilled by the amount of events in each section. Discusses a new lifestyle. In this book, it's not a new religion though, it's about magic in a sense that doesn't contradict with Christianity. Has a bit of self-help, in a sense that inspires one to take risks, trust oneself, explore the unknown, observe in our journey...etc Full of amazing and inspiring quotes, which I realized, if I quote them here, it will be such a cliche, so go read it yourself. On the other hand, what I personally loved about Brida, was the part about Soulmates. I do believe that each person has a soulmate somewhere.

Does it bother anyone, other than me, how the security personnel at the malls go through your bags ? I mean, it's one thing that we're probably the only country in the world where a shopping mall is treated , with regards to security regulations, as an airport; with the dogs sniffing around your car before you enter the parking lot, metal detector gates that you pass through, machines to monitor your bags/purse at every entry..etc. It's completely another thing that although they have those huge complex machines which you put your bag on to be monitored, they never use them, and instead they have some girl in a security uniform, who is totally ignorant about everything in life , let alone items that breach security, go through my handbag watching my purse, makeup, USB stick, laptop..etc. I find it really annoying. It has been annoying me for a while but last night , it got on my nerve big time. The girl actually was touching my stuff , messing my bag, not just looking in. T