Introduction
As it happens, my parents are very popular people; so everyone they know wants to somehow favor them by proposing a potential suitor for the eldest unmarried spinster daughter that is me, humbly. So, last weekend , my father ,after not having the opportunity to talk for a while, instead of bonding and sharing a father-daughter moment, decides to ruin the mood and bring up the whole "Yasmine, you're older now, we have to get you married" conversation. And then, he talks about 3 potential suitors just to make this conversation even more dramatic. For a change, I decided to be polite, obedient and just listen to what he has to say without arguing and just let him get it over with.
Assumptions
Having actually heard the options available on the market these days (sorry for putting it this way, but it just seems like it), I realized, that, actually there are a few interesting people one can possibly meet. Aside from my views regarding arranged marriages and blind dates, and aside from the fact whether or not I have someone I compare to, some people might actually be interesting to meet, have I been emotionally available and met them by chance socially.
Step 1-
Now, that being said, I kept reflecting on that thought on my way to work one morning. Somehow Cairo traffic added to deep thinking on life the universe and everything. So that brilliant morning, on my way to work, I started considering why, in fact, was I so reluctant to meet anyone new?Why don't I go places where I can meet someone interesting ? And why do I stick to my closed circle of friends where I know that I won't potentially find my self head-over-heels for? And then I kept thinking and thinking, until it hit me, that in fact , I am relationship-phobic (if there is such a word) probably due to the amount of rubbish I've been through.
Step 2-
So, still on my way to work with this great revelation, I realize, that perhaps this relationship-phobia syndrome is why I am putting myself through the same emotional trauma of being emotionally attached to those who are not emotionally unaccessible/unavailable. In other words, I find it safe to fall in love with people who I'm sure will not fall in love with me for whichever random reason or the other; as this way, I realized, I get all the "I'm in love" part without the relationship part, which makes me not only a relationship-phobic but also a major drama queen.
Step 3-
Realizing the whole attachment-to-the-unavailable part, I didn't even bother to put much thought in it before the epiphany just appeared to me. I'm over him!
How cool is that!
Aftermath
Ok, so although he has no idea I'm over him or that I was in love with him in the first place.
And although he was never in love with me nor knew I existed.
But somehow as the irony of life would have it, now that I started putting the "over him" plans to action, he started paying more attention to me!
Now that could be my mind playing tricks on me,
or simply life teaching me that the whole "over him" business is not as easy as it seems.
or there might be a slim 1% chance that it's true..
But I made my decision... I'm over him khalas!
And yes, I am aware that I said "over him" so many times, but maybe if I say it enough times, it might actually come true!
As it happens, my parents are very popular people; so everyone they know wants to somehow favor them by proposing a potential suitor for the eldest unmarried spinster daughter that is me, humbly. So, last weekend , my father ,after not having the opportunity to talk for a while, instead of bonding and sharing a father-daughter moment, decides to ruin the mood and bring up the whole "Yasmine, you're older now, we have to get you married" conversation. And then, he talks about 3 potential suitors just to make this conversation even more dramatic. For a change, I decided to be polite, obedient and just listen to what he has to say without arguing and just let him get it over with.
Assumptions
Having actually heard the options available on the market these days (sorry for putting it this way, but it just seems like it), I realized, that, actually there are a few interesting people one can possibly meet. Aside from my views regarding arranged marriages and blind dates, and aside from the fact whether or not I have someone I compare to, some people might actually be interesting to meet, have I been emotionally available and met them by chance socially.
Step 1-
Now, that being said, I kept reflecting on that thought on my way to work one morning. Somehow Cairo traffic added to deep thinking on life the universe and everything. So that brilliant morning, on my way to work, I started considering why, in fact, was I so reluctant to meet anyone new?Why don't I go places where I can meet someone interesting ? And why do I stick to my closed circle of friends where I know that I won't potentially find my self head-over-heels for? And then I kept thinking and thinking, until it hit me, that in fact , I am relationship-phobic (if there is such a word) probably due to the amount of rubbish I've been through.
Step 2-
So, still on my way to work with this great revelation, I realize, that perhaps this relationship-phobia syndrome is why I am putting myself through the same emotional trauma of being emotionally attached to those who are not emotionally unaccessible/unavailable. In other words, I find it safe to fall in love with people who I'm sure will not fall in love with me for whichever random reason or the other; as this way, I realized, I get all the "I'm in love" part without the relationship part, which makes me not only a relationship-phobic but also a major drama queen.
Step 3-
Realizing the whole attachment-to-the-unavailable part, I didn't even bother to put much thought in it before the epiphany just appeared to me. I'm over him!
How cool is that!
Aftermath
Ok, so although he has no idea I'm over him or that I was in love with him in the first place.
And although he was never in love with me nor knew I existed.
But somehow as the irony of life would have it, now that I started putting the "over him" plans to action, he started paying more attention to me!
Now that could be my mind playing tricks on me,
or simply life teaching me that the whole "over him" business is not as easy as it seems.
or there might be a slim 1% chance that it's true..
But I made my decision... I'm over him khalas!
And yes, I am aware that I said "over him" so many times, but maybe if I say it enough times, it might actually come true!
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