A piece of my mind

I have no idea how it does this to you, but Alexandria has this effect of evoking long lost and buried memories. None of those memories are related to Alexandria per se, I only went there for a single day as an adult and perhaps one or two other times when I was under 8. Although it was a very peaceful weekend, it just brought all sorts of sadness. The moment I reached Cairo, I cried for 3 hours continuous. Painful memories from years ago came back to haunt me without any apparent reason; memories of things that I hated, of people I hated, of people who I loved who did things I hated... The problem is, once the tears started, the heart becomes softer and there is no way to stop.

مش عارفة الموضوع ده بيحصل للناس كلها ولا لي انا بس , دائما كانت أمي تدعو لي دعوات على مزجها , ماهاش أي علاقة باللي انا فعلا عيزاه . يعني مثلا لأكون مزنوقة في قرشين و لأقولها يا ماما أدعيلي ربنا يفك ديقتي , تقوم تدعيلي مثلا بإبن الحلال أو أقولها أدعيلي ربنا يوفقني مثلا في اجتماع مهم في الشغل , هي تدعيلي مثلا ربنا يوقفلي في طريقي ولاد الحلال. كله حجات من النوع ده لحد ما أنا اصلا قلت خلاص هي مع نفساها بقى , تدعي على كيفها و أدعي على كيفي كل ده عادي, الجديد بقى ان من كام شهر كده بقى في دعوة جديد , "ربنا يحبب فيكي خلقه" . الصراحة , الدعوة حلوة , و حبيتها. أصل حب الناس نعمة من ربنا , و بعدين حد يكره الناس تحبه؟ كل حاجة في الدنيا بتمشي اسهل لما الناس تحب الواحد . قلت ماش , الحمد لله برده , مافيش احسن من دعوة الأم. لكن من كام يوم, قبل مانزل من البيت , أمي قلتهالي تاني. و نزلت و عملت الى ورايا و جيت على اخر اليوم بركب العربية علشان اروح , ظهرلي منادي من تحت الأمر , قلت ماشي , أمرنا لله و طلعت الجنيه من المحفظة و بفتح الشباك علشان اديهوله و ظهرت المعجزة , الراجل رفض الجنيه !! ايوه ...

I'm just not a wedding person. Plain and simple. Not only did I always not like them, but also, it grows worse every wedding. Anyway, last Friday, I went to the wedding of a close friend of mine from school. And although non-customary, I really wanted to go, AND I thought I looked nice. I went to the wedding, met my school friends (who are mostly guys) and some other people I know. So, on the scale of feeling out of place(which i always feel in weddings), this was the least intensive. Yet somehow, I felt too tall, too big and by far too old! Oh, and need I mention how the skirts keep getting shorter! lol, each to their own. Anyway, I'm not complaining really. These are facts of life that I need to deal with; growing older, fatter, girls getting younger and prettier, skirts getting shorter...and so on. My point being, I have a resolution.. if I ever get married, I won't have a wedding. Just documenting my brilliant and amazing thoughts

I didn't get to tell you about Feb. Well, I sort of did; I've been blogging more than usual. But I didn't tell you how it ended. Feb started with questioning my choices, my friends, my decision and my lifestyle (-1 point). It was a tough start, especially when M gave me a hard time (-1) but that ended well when I realized that I do have very supportive and very understanding friends who actually proved to me that my company is much more important than perhaps a glass of wine (many many friends) (+1 point). Not only that, but that oppportunity got me closer to my friend L (+1). And finally my good friend R gave me a speech on how he wanted to be there for me had I just called him. He was way more supportive than I thought. I actually assumed he'd give me a hard time, but in fact, the guy was so nice (+1). There have been moments of anger, mostly because of work (-1) but these went away at the last day of work (details later... hard to score here) There have been hours o...